Some people effortlessly draw others in with charisma, while others struggle to spark any conversation. Want to know what sets these naturally charming individuals apart?
Although it appears this way, their charm isn’t just luck. It’s a quality they’ve cultivated over time. By understanding these habits, you, too, can charm others in any situation. Let’s dive into these habits and discover how you can adopt them in your own life.
1. Active Listening
It’s not enough to only hear someone. You can listen to someone while you play video games, but if the other person is pouring out their feelings to you, it’s highly doubtful they’ll feel like you’re listening. However, if you provide your undivided attention to someone and tune into their thoughts and how they may be feeling, you’ll feel special to them.
Although active listening is universally understood, it’s not something most people can do. Nowadays, it’s easy to get distracted looking at your phone or multitasking some other way.
2. Sincere Compliments
Have you ever been complimented on your sneakers or a shirt? You probably felt on top of the world—if the comment was genuine. Sincere compliments are rare. The next time you’re at a coffee shop and see someone wearing something you genuinely like, let them know. You can bet they’ll leave thinking highly of you.
3. Consistent Eye Contact
Eye contact is essential. It’s not hard to understand. You may feel upset if you’re talking to a friend and they’re constantly looking away. Not making eye contact shows you’re disengaged and potentially want to leave a conversation. However, do the opposite, and the other person will instantly know you’re engaged in what they have to say. They may not instantly love you for it, but they will surely appreciate it.
4. Genuine Smiles
Smiles are contagious. You can have a bad day, but when someone smiles at you, you’ll feel tempted to smile back. This is why it’s important to smile often. Don’t force a smile. Instead, practice being comfortable with your natural emotions.
If you’re introverted, you may feel awkward smiling in public or in front of certain people. However, smiling more will not only lift other people’s moods but yours as well.
5. Positive Body Language
Smiling and making eye contact are examples of expressing positive body language toward others. You can also nod to acknowledge others. Body language is the way you communicate with others without using words. Your facial expressions and body movements give other insights into what you may be thinking.
6. Remembering Names
There are many techniques to remember someone’s name, but repetition is key. When someone tells you their name, repeat it a few times in your head. Try calling the person by their first name a few times so it registers. If you forget, just apologize sincerely and move on.
7. Showing Empathy
Life can be hard, and it’s during these tough times that people open up to their close circle. Sometimes, you may find yourself opening up to strangers—or having them open up to you. Regardless, acknowledging their feelings and taking the initiative to understand their feelings will go a long way.
Sometimes, people want to be heard and don’t need advice on what steps to take. Not everyone has the emotional intelligence to show active empathy toward others, so if you can do this, more people will come back to you.
8. Being Present
Being present involves actively listening or doing a task without being distracted. However, it’s easy to scroll on your phone mindlessly or attempt to multitask while speaking with others. You may even be disengaged in some conversations but are too afraid to leave.
However, you’re better off leaving these conversations instead of being half-present. Being present isn’t only about paying attention to others. It also involves paying attention to how you feel.
9. Humility
If you show humility toward others, they’ll surely appreciate it. At the very least, treating others with respect and not assuming you’re above them will open the door to genuine connection. This isn’t something you should do to gain popularity. If you stay humble, no matter your accolades, you’ll surely have people flock to you because they will feel safe.
10. Good Sense of Humor
Why so serious? Life is tough, and you shouldn’t neglect your feelings. However, if you crack a joke that lightens up tough situations, you’ll lift your own and other peoples’ spirits. It’s a no-brainer why people will like you. Being around you will boost their moods. What’s not to love about that?
11. Openness to New Ideas
It’s okay to be right, but even being right gets old. The truth is no one knows it all. You’re better off having an open mind and knowing that there are often many ways to achieve the same result. Having an open mind will allow you to give others the benefit of the doubt. People will enjoy being around you because they know you won’t try to force your point of view on them.
12. Reliability
You don’t know who your true friends are until you’re in trouble. It’s sad but true. Some friends are great to be around only during the good times, but others will rescue you when you’re facing life’s challenges.
Although you can’t control how others respond, you can control how you react to others. If you pay attention, you’ll often see opportunities when others need you, and you may be able to help. Don’t wait for others to ask for help. Take the initiative by actively listening and being empathetic.
13. Graciousness
Showing graciousness is more than just being kind and courteous; it’s about showing respect toward others, and offering help when needed. Not everyone is this way, so if you are, you’ll slowly win people over, no matter the setting.
14. Patience
Patience is a virtue—and a rare quality in our fast-paced world. However, patience shouldn’t be confused with complacency. You can be patient while saving for retirement, knowing you’re saving more each year. On the other hand, constantly complaining about why you’re still years away from retirement means you lack patience.
15. Curiosity
Showing you’re curious about someone else’s situation or hobbies will attract others to you. Why? Think about it: Would you want to be around someone who hates their job or someone who loves what they do?
Assuming you practice the other points mentioned in this list and someone is interested in the same topic, they’ll quickly connect with you. Even if someone isn’t curious about the same things you are, your enthusiasm will be attractive to others.
16. Tactfulness
The ability to exit tough conversations politely or not offend others is a valuable skill. Others will flock to you because you’ll be easier to talk to. This skill will carry one to all your relationships, so it’s worth building.
17. Encouraging Others
During your low points, you benefit from encouragement. However, you may not always find it. This is why encouraging others will instantly make you attractive. You’ll appear like a great friend who can lift people’s moods. Just make sure not to neglect your own feelings—you need to encourage yourself, too.
18. Apologizing When Necessary
No matter how careful you are, you’ll make mistakes. You may hurt someone’s feelings or say something you can’t take back. Hopefully, your mistakes aren’t too costly, but apologizing will go a long way when you’re wrong.
You don’t need to take the stoic approach where everything is your fault; not everything is under your control. However, if you’re quick to acknowledge your mistakes, others will respect you and enjoy being around you.